Frustrated!

Why does Kolette continue to make me question? After the rough first year of her life it seemed like it has been pretty good. We haven't had to go the E.R since Sept and haven't been hospitalized since last January. So why is she having freak fevers at night all the time now? For the past year it has been about once a month that she gets a fever at night and then is totally gone in the morn. I don't keep her from doing things just b/c she had a fever at night b/c she would never get to do anything.

Now she has a fever again of 103.6 and it is at least the 10th in the past 3 weeks. So I broke down and called the on call doctor. I cringe when I call b/c I don't want to talk to very many about it other than Dr. Matt and Dr. Dunbrasky who is who called me tonite. So in a way I feel like I am getting an answer and also it scares me. She said that we need to get a blood work up on her. But it would be better to get it while she has the fever. Ok, but she only gets them at night. She said she didn't want me to go to the ER but that I need to bring her in tomorrow and they will do one and also give me a note to take to the ER next time she gets a fever and I won't have to see the ER doctor and just get the blood work up done. She also asked if she had ever had a rhumatoid work up? Uh no. So she said that might be a good idea b/c it can tell if it is lupus since that shows up as a fever sometimes. That makes me want to cry. One of my good friends has s/thing related to Lupus and I understand how horrible it is for her. So I am trying to not borrow trouble. But she is my baby and I don't want her to be sick or suffer any lifelong illness. Can't I just take it on and leave her alone. Ok, I know I am getting ahead of myself but really it is scary to have a child you love more than life itself sick and know you have no control over getting them better. I know what she looks like on the edge of death and it was the worst thing to ever happen in my life. I pray that whatever it is that is causing her problem can be fixed. I pray that God allows the doctors to see what is causing the fevers. I pray that she is ok. Please pray for her too.